This week has been quite strange in many ways. Most apparent, has been the lack of time my feet have spent meeting face to face with my white floor tiles - that's right, I've barely been home. For those who do not know, I'm a homebody at heart. Really. Being outside in the world, shooting, meeting people, and playing with my camera under the sun is bubbles of fun, but at the end of it all, I'm happiest when my back is pressed again the soft texture of my couch. Feet perched up on the glass coffeetable in front of me, cuddling my hand picked black velvet pillows.
This week, I've had none of that. Tonight, I sit here in bed, and my mind is able to be still. It's the first time I've had this tranquility of mind and body in what has seemed like years. It's only been a few weeks I know, but when you get into times where you work almost every day, it FEELS like its been years when you last rested. I know the whirlwind of never ending to do lists will crank up and start all over again when my lids open tomorrow morning, but for now, this space is mine. This quiet is mine. My only companions are the whirring of the fan, and the ticking march that my clock hands churn out. I love it. To a homebody, this is like water to a thirsty man.
In moments like this, my mind stops running in circles trying to chase and lassoo down all the items on my checklists. Instead, it likes to run towards God, and the things that have made my heart smile in the last few weeks despite some downs in between. For one, God continually surprises me - just when I think I could not be blessed even further with the most wonderful people to work for and with - He shows me otherwise. Some people I've had the pleasure to photograph in recent weeks have been absolute gems - you know, the kind you just want to hug and thank a million times over for making work, just not feel like work. You are truly wonderful Heavenly Father for bringing such blessing. I hope that I may be able to always praise your name. Not only in times such as these, but also in the inevitable moments that life brings where our soul is downcast. But for now, thank you for letting me do what I love. I am always always aware that not everyone is able to enjoy such a blessing, and I am ever mindful of the small beginnings I started on when I shot my first year of weddings with a 350D and a single 50mm lens (some shots to date taken from that setup are still on my website!)...being teased for having 'small' gear, being second guessed about my ability to take worthy photos...and having to fight for respect just because I wasn't a male in this industry...so I pray that I never take your blessing for granted.
To those who are still chasing their dreams, keep praying, keep running...don't give up whatever your challenges are because God willing, you may be standing on the other side of the line saying 'I did it' one day.
Here is a photo from a wedding I shot just yesterday in KL. You will have to wait a while to see the rest, but I promise you they will be worth it :) It's split second moments like these that really plant golden rays of sunshine in my soul.

6 comments:
that part about the "soft texture of my couch" makes me feel so sad...'cos we still haven't bought a couch *sigh*
look how far you've come...from a 350D + 50mm...it really goes to show that gear is not everything, well done =)
350d+50mm...that sound like the gear that i used when ur here in Melb...:p
Hi Jenny, been following your blog for quite some time and this is my first comment here. Love your photos very much, thanks for this encouraging post. God Bless.
thank you for sharing ur ups and downs with it. not only are you being real with us, but you're a true testimony of how real God is and wants to be in our lives....
thanks for this encouraging post...it came at a right time. :)
Amen :)
Hi Jenny..
You have encouraged me so much through this post of yours..
I am a huge fan of your work and knowing that you started out from a humble beginning, motivates me even more to pursue my dream as a photographer..
God has indeed blessed you with this beautiful gift..
Thank you so much for being an encouragement..
God bless.. :)
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