I shouldn't be up at this hour. Let alone blogging! But I can't help it. The thought has been stewing in my mind for the last few days. And sadly, I was not born the type of person who could bottle things in for long. I am THAT person who buys the perfect present and then HAS to tell the recipient before Christmas because I can't keep my excitement in.
What am I rambling about? I'm a chronic romantic. I won't show it. In fact, talk to me long enough, and you won't even breathe a hint of it. But existing in the crevices of my veins, in hidden spaces, I am a chronic romantic.
A chronic romantic. It means that even at the age of 28, I still love fairytales. I still love the fact that serendipity can throw your life into a frenzy, but as a result you 'accidentally' meet your prince charming against all odds. I still love that you can spend years searching, only to realize the one for you was the one in front of you the whole time. I still love the idea of kisses in the rain. I still love that moonlit walks on the beach while the warm summer breeze gently wraps its wings through your hair is one of the most lovely adventures you can go on in twos. I still love the notion that first loves can also be your last. I still love that it is never too late to tell the one you love them. And I still love that you can hope for any of the above while waiting for love to hit you in it's own unique way whether in sentimental glittery, or steadfast determination.
I've spent the past few days lost... LOST in decision. Because frankly I can't make one. I'm elbow deep in submissions from real-life couples for my upcoming workshop in Singapore, and one of the questions I asked each pair of lovers was 'Tell me your love story". Most photographers would look at me with a raised eyebrow and go 'why do you care? Just pick the best looking ones and use them for your workshop'. But you see, when you are a chronic romantic, you can't help but care. You can't help but want to know what draws two people together. What trials and tribulations they have gone through together. What joys they have shared. And how the tides of life join and then lock two souls as one despite distance, or personal differences, or breakups, or even just the weathering of time.
To me? To the chronic romantic? It all matters. Every last drop of it matters.
Hollywood throws at us so many concoctions and portrayals of how love is, or how love weaves through our lives, how love gives birth, and how love departs....but in all honesty, with my job, and the lovers I meet on such a frequent basis, I say it is the real life lovers that win. Hands down. Because they are genuine. Validated by the honest rawness of life . And that is what makes it oh-so-palpable, not to mention inspiring to transcend in photos.
So that is why it is hard. So hard. All because I am a chronic romantic. Who cares.
I have to make a decision soon, but I wanted to tell you that. So that next time if I ask you to tell me about the two of you, or share your love story. It is because deep down in the marrow of my bones, I cherish the story of the union. I love hearing. It makes me smile, and it continues to prove to me that despite all the ugly that can arise from love, it can still be the most wondrous and beautiful experience, and that real true love (though hard), can definitely undeniably last.
Thank you to any of my couples (past and present) who have shared your lives and love story so openly with me, and then let me translate that to the photos that hang on your walls. Please know you have left footprints on my heart.
**Sneak peek from one of my last shoots of 2010. A love story that truly moved me :) **